First Things First; Why This Must Be Done
I, being the ‘goer-alonger,’ the ‘go-with-the-flow-gal’, have always had things ‘just happening to me’. I don’t think I’ve ever made a concrete plan in my life!
I flitted through school; luckily for me, I had half a brain and a good memory, so I did alright academically. As a kid, I was physically active, and quite a tomboy, so somehow found myself doing sports – the first sport I properly tried and was alright at, was one that my friend dragged me along to, because she herself wanted to start. In fact, even the second sport I ever tried was because another friend took me along!
I got chosen for a part in the school play by just tagging along with friends, waiting for them to get their auditions over and done with.
I went to University because I got in, not because of a burning desire for a degree, ambition about a vocation, or as a means to end.
I got a great job because a friend spotted a vacancy that would suit me and made me apply.
And so on and so forth…
So…you see a trend in motion…?
Sure, I (generally complainingly, or martyr-ishly) worked hard when I had to, when push came to shove, and am now grateful to every opportunity and experience that came my way, that made me work hard, and exposed me to change, so I could realise my potential by leaving my comfort zone.
I burned the midnight oil over my books (probably because I didn’t have a study time-table and was cramming the night before!), trained until I couldn’t feel my body anymore, put my heart and soul into my job and the people I worked with, and did pretty well in most things.
All, with reckless abandon.
I have now arrived somewhere really meaningful, without any real exertion, without a master plan, with no particular ambition, no goals. In short, without looking any further than my own nose…
Suddenly I’m mother, wife and household-runner! I have to actually bring up kids! I have to maintain stuff! This is huge! For God’s sake, almost four years into this, isn’t it about time I finally Got it Together?!!
Secondly – Simplify
Throughout my life, in order to better understand things, I’ve always simplified them; broken them down to the bare minimum just so I can get a grasp of which way the tuk-tuk is swerving, or which way the beetle juice is flying…so to speak.
It’s basically the art of skimming and summarising, but in relation to life. This is probably not very fair to all the deep dark complexities of the Universe, not to mention Existentialism, Freudian Theory and all that other stuff …but it works for me.
So as I figure, there are two kinds of people in the world. At this point in my life, these two kinds of people can all be pretty much be related to either myself, or my husband. At earlier stages, this probably fluctuated, and corresponded to my friends, parents or family instead.
The two kinds of people that exist in my world now, can pretty much be divided according to this funky table (with a few overlaps and crisscrossing here and there):
|2. Has a good concept of time, space and the value of money||Has no concept whatsoever of time, space and most of all the value of money (or even where it goes)|
|3. Knows their limits||Doesn’t have a clue!|
|4. Has realistic expectations||Has expectations so unrealistic that they almost count as no expectations at all in the end, due to their unattainability!|
|5. Head first||Heart first|
|8. Gets things done||Faffs around|
|9. Responsible||Largely irresponsible|
|12. Right handed||Left handed|
|13. Realist||Idealist (see 3 and 4 above)|
|14. Fairly stressed due to being all of the above plus having to cope with all that –||Pretty darned relaxed because ‘oh things will take care of themselves’|
So, amidst many other characteristics you may possess, you might find yourself leaning towards one kind or the other. Now, don’t get me wrong; there are positives and negatives in both.
I clearly belong in column two (FYI, in case you don’t know me).
Action! So, what I need to do is sift through the column, sort out the positives and negatives, and focus on working on the negatives that disrupt my life (and the lives of those around me) the most. Also, I feel that in my case, the intensity of some of the positives also need managing…and so we begin!